wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I'm getting married
To pizza
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
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