If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Just saw a homeless guy with a sign that said "Family abducted by aliens. Need money for ransom" and on the back of the sign it said "And it's only $.88"
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
