I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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