I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
