Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Randomize
