Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
