just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Randomize
