at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
