i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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