Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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