If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Randomize
