Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I'm the fucking queen of sexting. I just made a blowjob sound so poetic I'm wishing I were a guy just so I could blow me. Learn from me.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
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