just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
you have to choose: penises or morals?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Randomize
