why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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