so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize