Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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