yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
