If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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