You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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