when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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