I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
