I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I think people are normalizing furries
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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