I like my sex mixed with concussions.
plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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