I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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