Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize
