Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
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