just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
so much tequila, so little girl.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
Randomize
