just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize
