girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
