I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
