hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
