She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
