i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I fill condoms, not promises.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Couch. On fire.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
