the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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