I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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