i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Randomize
