I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Going to spend my cab money on more shots and just take the ambulance home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
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