That's when you crack a 10am beer
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
