Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Randomize
