Barsexuality is the new black.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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