Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
It's official drugs can't kill me
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
