i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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