I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
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