They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
