In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
Randomize
