Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
