I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
