her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
