I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
