Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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