im drinking this country out of the recession.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
Randomize
